Ten Commandments of Marriage

Ten Commandments of Marriage

TEN COMMANDMENTS OF MARRIAGE

Commandment 1

Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are
thunder and lightning.

Commandment 2.
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention
to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

Commandment 3.
Marriage is grand — and divorce is at least 100 grand!

Commandment 4.
Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of
marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

Commandment 5.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be
sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.

Commandment 6.
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

Commandment 7.
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about
something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before
you finish.

Commandment 8.
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding,
economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.

Commandment 9..

Marriage and love are purely matter of chemistry.

That is whythe wife treats the husband like toxic waste.

Commandment 10.
A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished…

Bonus Commandment story.
A long married couple came upon a wishing well.
The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.
The husband decided to make a wish too.
But he leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.
The wife was stunned for a moment but then smiled,
“Wow! This stuff really works!”

This entry was posted in Jokes - so funny!. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Ten Commandments of Marriage

  1. Initial D says:

    haha…actually? The picture is gross but hey let’s face it, 50 years from now and we’d look like the above image.

    I like Commandment Number 7. It is inevitable :-)

  2. Scorpionman says:

    Hehehe…seems like you are contemplating on getting married but then again is afraid to get into it….

  3. Yayanne says:

    Do you know why some marriage don’t last? Because the BRIDE didn’t marry the BESTMAN. I wish someday I could marry the BESTMAN instead the GROOM! ;-)

  4. Initial D says:

    hahaha…Bar first before marriage ;p

Leave a Reply